Feeling a tiny bit overwhelmed...

So, earlier today if you had asked me if I knew what I wanted to happen during Peanut's birth, I would've been able to give you a definite 100% answer. Now, I have realized there is so much more that I need to consider. Luckily, I'm starting at 6 weeks to figure out a birth plan instead of waiting for the very last second. I also have a super amazing lady who I'm going to ask to be my doula to help me figure these things out. Yes, Rochelle, I'm talkin bout you sister!

First off, why a doula? Well, for those of you who don't know, Rochelle is SUPER passionate in all things birth. She's also super knowledgeable, and she's not afraid to do exactly what a doula does : ADVOCATE for her client (in this case, me). If I say I don't want any pain meds and there's no medical reason for me to have them, she's going to get in that pill pusher's face and tell him/her to back the H off. Then if I start screaming for the drugs, she's going to drag that pill pusher into my room kicking and screaming. ;) Yes, John can do this too, but really, I don't want John leaving my side through this whole thing. I think it would be super great to have 2 amazing coaches, John and Rochelle, and then everyone else who comes to see me too. Rochelle also knows all about natural childbirth. I mean, the woman is a walking encyclopedia of birth. She's going to be able to show John how to touch and hold me, and together they can help me get into positions that will facilitate labor while decreasing pain. Rochelle and John are gonna be the 2 who know my birth plan in and out, and neither one of them will be scared to say "Hey. This is how we're doing it if there's no real medical need to do it a different way."

So I was reading one of Rochelle's links today on facebook about birth plans, and thought "oh my geez, I never thought to look at a sample birth plan online..." Sooooo I did. Wow. I have a LOT of stuff to work through and figure out. First thing I'm going to have to do is come up with questions and scenarios to take to the hospital to talk to an actual Labor and Delivery nurse who can answer me. For instance, I do NOT want my child to be out of my room unless there is a medical need. I want to be able to warm my child skin on skin instead of Peanut laying under a heat lamp without anyone holding him/her. If my child needs to go to the nursery, I want John to be glued to that baby's side so he can step in and say "nuh uh, don't you give that baby a bottle or I will sue you from here until the next century" or give consent for things like the standard blood tests, etc. I know for sure I have 2 other BIG questions for the hospital. If they give me answers I really, really don't like, it's almost a guarantee I will at least be checking out different hospitals around. A home birth honestly terrifies me, but if it comes down to it that that's the only way I'm going to get anywhere near the experience I'm looking for, it may happen. I'm not one of those "throw her on her back and tell her to shut up" kind of people. No. Effing. Way.

So I started a birth plan. Well, I have a "I clicked these boxes and this is what I got" birth plan. Hey, I had to start somewhere. Having a general idea of where to start, I can start formulating questions to give to my doctor tomorrow at my very first prenatal appointment AND ultrasound (yay!!!!!). And you know, if he's not willing to work with me, then I'm not willing to work with him, plain and simple.

Writing about how overwhelming formulating a birth plan feels right now helps me say "yeah. Alright. Not so bad. I can do this!" I felt so passionate about my sister's birth and everything I absolutely hated about it. I was told then "well, it's just how things work. You kinda have to do it. You don't have a choice." B. S. I'm 2 years older now and KNOW better. Just because no one took the time to ask her doesn't mean I won't make someone make the time for me.

Another super passionate post about my pregnancy here in Shandiland! I swear, they won't all be about Peanut, but it's kind of hard not to talk about the little critter in my belly. :)